My Pillar

“And the Lord did not remove the pillar of cloud or pillar of fire from their sight.”

Exodus 13:22

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I had been a newlywed for five days when my Mom died.
I had just barely begun the journey into becoming a wife and step-mom.  I didn’t quite know what to expect but I was excited!  I had been delivered from singleness and felt confident that even my worst day in this new life was sure to be better than any day I had experienced before it.  Then, without warning, my biggest human advocate and resource was taken from me and, shortly thereafter, I realized that the challenges in my new role were foreign and scary.  These new trials made me quickly realize that I longed for the security of my old life.  However, with my Mom gone, even if I wanted to retreat to her comfort or simply be in the presence of some semblance of my old life, I couldn’t.
The Israelites had finally been delivered from 450 years of slavery in Egypt and were on their way to the Promised Land.  Exodus 13:17-18 details how complete God’s wisdom was so early in this journey.

“When Pharaoh finally let the people go, God did not lead them on the road that runs through Philistine territory, even though that was the shortest way from Egypt to the Promised Land.  God said, ‘If the people are faced with a battle, they might change their minds and return to Egypt.’  So God led them along a route through the wilderness toward the Red Sea, and the Israelites left Egypt like a marching army.” (Exodus 13:17-18)

But God didn’t leave them alone, without comfort or guidance.

“The Lord guided them by a pillar of cloud during the day and a pillar of fire at night.  That way they could travel whether it was day or night.  And the Lord did not remove the pillar of cloud or pillar of fire from their sight.” (Exodus 13:21-22)

God appeared in physical form for his people so that they knew, even in this foreign territory and seemingly vulnerable state, they had light, guidance, protection and comfort.  He never left their side.  If I am following God to my Promised Land, he may choose to lead me through the more difficult path that doesn’t allow retreat.  I may have lost my access to the life I lived before this Exodus, but what I have now is One who is all-knowing, all-powerful and all-loving.  He will guide me and keep me.  I will not fear my “wilderness.”  I will not fear the unknown.  I will not wish for a retreat.

 “Be strong and courageous.  Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.” (Deuteronomy 31:6)

He has given me his wisdom in the Bible.  His words are the pillars that never leave me; day and night they are available to me as I travel.  I am so thankful for this promise!

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Dear Lord, my Pillar, you lead me into the wilderness and I follow you.  I do not know how to get to the Promised Land, but you do.  Thank you for being tangible to me.  Please forgive me for all the times I choose to trust my fear over you. Make me strong and courageous, never afraid.  Thank you for wanting me and leading me.  Amen.


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About messyworship

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I believe that you can bump into God outside of a Sunday morning church service. That is what Messy Worship is: a written meditation with an authentic, transparent take on the Bible's application to today's world. This is where I challenge myself to blurr the line between "life" and "worship" so much that the line disappears a little more each day. I hope, by sharing what I learn, the idea of a seamless life of worship becomes contagious.

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    Great perspective, Emily. I look forward to reading these! 🙂

    SAHM I Am / Reply

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